With the exception of soccer, no other professional sports league has sexier players than Major League Baseball. NFL players are largely obese, overmuscled and brain addled from concussions; NBA players are freakishly tall and look silly in their baggy shorts; and the NHL teams are full of players with missing teeth and "ice rage" issues.
Granted, there's not a whole lot of running, jumping, or tackling involved in baseball. Still, the players look great standing around posing in their snug stretch pants that hug their groin, thighs, biceps and calves. And while they stand at homeplate or out in the field waiting for next pitch it gives us fans time to ogle them as they play with their bat, adjust their cup, or stretch teasingly.
Out of the 750 or so players on active rosters of Major League Baseball's 30 teams, here, in no particular order, are a dozen of my favorite players:


Joe Mauer/ Minnesota Twins (29 years old/6'5"/230 lbs.). For me, Joe's All-American good looks bring to mind the character Joe Boyd, the baseball player in the movie and Broadway show Damn Yankees. In addition to playing baseball Mauer is also a TV spokesperson for Head and Shoulders shampoo.


David Wright/ NY Mets (29 years old/6'1"/210 lbs.) - He's like a little puppy dog, i.e. always smiling and eager to please. Not surprisingly, he's the Mets ambassador of good will.


Grady Sizemore/ Cleveland Indians (29 years old/6'2"/200 lbs.) - Definitely a cool drink of water. But what a shame that he ended up in Cleveland!


Albert Pujols/LA Angels (32 years old/6'3"/230 lbs.) - A slab of 100% pure Dominican beef with a mighty bat. Three MVP Awards and two World Series rings got him a 10-year, $254 million contract from his new team, the Angels. Ay papi indeed!


Ichiro Suzuki/ Seattle Mariners (38 years old/5'11"/170 lbs.) - Somewhat like Toyota, Ichiro is the Japanese import whose had the greatest success in the U.S., becoming one of the greatest hitters of all time.


Carlos Beltran/ St. Louis Cardinals (35 years old/6'1"/215 lbs.) - First, I've always had a weakness for the name Carlos. Second, I think he has has the most beautiful lips of any ballplayer. Sadly, he was traded from the Mets last summer.


Matt Kemp/LA Dodgers (27 years old/6'3"/220 lbs.). His little black book may be as filled as that of Derek Jeter's (e.g. Rihanna, Eva Longoria) - and he's 10 years Jeter's junior.

Andy Pettitte/NY Yankees (39 years old/6'5"/225 lbs) - Although he turns 40 in June and is a towering 6'5", he still has the qualities of a little boy (albeit with a pronounced five o'clock shadow). And his touch of a drawl from the Louisiana bayou makes him even more endearing.

CJ Wilson/LA Angels (31 years old/6'1"/210 lbs.) - A pitcher who looks like he came from the same gene pool as Grady Sizemore and Ryan Braun (below).


Ryan Braun/ Milwaukee Brewers (28 years old/6'1"/200 lbs). One of baseball's few Jewish ballplayers, his nickname is the "Hebrew Hammer".

Johnny Damon/ Cleveland Indians (38 years old/6'2"/205 lbs.) - Whether sporting the shaggy mane he had in his days with the Red Sox or shortly cropped hair afterward, Johnny is adorable. Like David Wright, a very rambunctious puppy.


Jose Bautista/Toronto Blue Jays (31 years old/6'/190 lbs.) - If you didn't know his name you might think Bautista is of Israeli heritage, but like Albert Pujols he's from the Dominican Republic. Over the past few years he's become quite a home run hitter.


And a shout-out to retired studs such as Javy Lopez (near right), Carlos Delgado (far right) and Brady Anderson (center). Speaking of Anderson, for a number years at my summer share in Fire Island we had somewhat of a shrine to him, i.e. the poster to the right hanging in the living room above the fireplace.
And although the following four players didn't make the cut for the above list they deserve mention because of their great names: Xavier Nady; Hunter Pence; Ian Kinsler and Chase Utley.