Oscar, the Anti-Christ and ABC

It's the countdown to the Oscars and I'm getting my tiara ready. 

I'm thankful that I thought better than to try and see all 10 nominated movies in the theatres for the following reasons:

• I would have spent at least $107.50 on movies tickets
• I would have spent double that on popcorn, soda and Skittles
• I would have gained at least 4 pounds
• I would still secretly hold the hope that George Clooney would win for Best Actor and there would still be a chance for Hangover to get nominated for Best Picture
• I wish there was a category for "Why Did I Waste My Money on this Movie" category.  Valentine's Day would win hands down.  (The fact that I went to go see it alone on the weekend of Valentine's Day did not help it's chances of surviving according to this critic)

But that ain't happening.

I am thrilled that Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin are hosting.  They were hysterical in a very under the radar, funny movie I saw by myself in Menlo Park Mall called It's Complicated. (Do I see a pattern here?  Me.  Movies. Alone?)  BUT WILL I BE ABLE TO WATCH IT?????????

Cablevision is the anti-Christ and ABC sucks (mainly because it airs The Bachelor).  Besides the fact that I can't get the song "Deja Vu" out of my head (remember Food Network and HGTV?) I now know what it feels like those few seconds when the presenters say "And the Oscar goes to....." 

Please, please, please Corporate Giants who make more money than God and McDonald's, please play nice in the sandbox, or cable-box,  and don't let my Oscar viewing party be an E! empty red carpet viewing party!